Sunday, August 12, 2012

The Pan Poly Path

I have mentioned in this blog that I'm bi and poly (ie, bisexual and polyamorous--see Sex and Squeamishness, 8/9/08).  Part of my reason for identifying as bisexual is my age--that's what I've identified with since high school (forty-five years).  The problem with bisexuality is that it assumes there are only two sexes, but if I were choosing an identity today, I'd probably say I was pansexual since I think I could be as easily involved with someone who identified as trans or genderqueer as I could with someone who identifies as a woman or a man.

All of which seems moot at the moment since I've taken a vow of abstinence while I'm pursuing community.  But as I'm exploring love (see my last post), I'm beginning to see other possibilities.  Sufi dancing (particularly the 'partner' dances where you keep switching partners and you never know who you'll get next) has also helped me see this in a new light.  (Not to mention studying about bonobos, who are truly pan and poly sexual.  For more on bonobos, see Bonobos and Chimpanzees, 7/30/08.)

I think that all love is erotic, in some way.  It doesn't mean I have to have sex with anyone, just acknowledge that there is a sexual/sensual element to all my loving--and this is a good thing.

And the fact that I can love anyone (being pan) and many people (being poly) opens me up to truly loving everyone I meet--regardless of gender, looks, age, race, class, etc, etc.  I can just greet each person I meet (like I try to do when I'm Sufi dancing) with lots of love and joyousness.  I have taken my sexuality and turned it into a spiritual path, opening myself up to loving everyone regardless of who they are.  Because everyone deserves love.  And that starts with me loving them--as much as I possibly can.

Quote of the Day: "Our loving finds a new depth, one that is both personal and impersonal. ...
"... the relationship journey is not about two people becoming one.  It is about realizing that we are all one vast, loving heart."  - Jett Psaris and Marena Lyons

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